It's a Mad Mad World
by mydoctortennant
Summary: When a spell goes a little bit wrong their worlds get turned upsidedown... first attempt at a crack!fic. Arthur/Gwen, some Gwen/Merlin


Merlin sat on his bed, leaning against his pillows. He was reading the book Gaius had given him on his first days in Camelot. He mumbled a few spells as he read them. He laughed at some of the spells, they were so ridiculous. One of them exchanged the minds of two bodies. He snorted a laugh and mumbled the incantation to himself. Laughing again at the stupidness of it, why would anyone what to switch places with people? He was perfectly happy as he was.

Laughing to himself still, Merlin closed the book and placed it on the table next to his bed, and blew out his candle. He'd need a good night sleep before Arthur started bossing him around the next morning. Followed by orders from Gaius and his day would be full of things to do and no time to stop.

-

Arthur shifted in his bed, half awake and aware that he was uncomfortable. No matter how many times he moved he still couldn't get comfortable.

"Merlin! Merlin!" he could hear himself shouting in his half asleep status. "Merlin, get up, Arthur will be expecting you!"

Arthur screwed his eyes shut, that definitely wasn't him. It was most confusing, was that Gaius? Why was Gaius there and why was he calling him Merlin?

He forced his eyes open to find himself under scratchy sheets in a single bed. A bed he knew wasn't his. He looked around; on the wooden floor he saw a bright blue neckerchief and a red over shirt. A brown jacket and boots he knew didn't belong to him. They belonged to-

"Merlin!" Gaius appeared at the door, "Good god, Merlin, how many times must I tell you to tidy your room?" he exclaimed, walking through the room and picking up the garments that were strewn across the floor.

"I'm not-"

"On time! No, you're not. Now hurry up before Arthur has your neck for being late. Again!"

Gaius left and Arthur sat up in Merlin's bed. He scratched the back of his head and ran his fingers through his fringe. A fringe that stopped far sooner than it should have. Arthur scowled, and pulled on his hair and tried to see it. He couldn't.

He jumped out of the bed and went to the window. He could see his reflection in the glass.

"No way."

-

Merlin's head hurt.

He rubbed the pads of his fingers on his forehead as he woke from his slumber.

Surrounded in pillows, and drapes and royal materials. Surrounded by Arthur's belongings in Arthur's room.

"What's going on?" it wasn't his voice he heard; it was that of his master, and the future King of Camelot. He scrambled out of the oversized bed and towards the screen to look in the mirror, "What did I _do_ last night?"

-

Arthur took off from Merlin's bedchamber having finally found a clean looking top and left the physician's quarters without so much as looking at Gaius or the breakfast that was lain on the table in the middle of the room.

He ran down the steps the circled down towards the courtyard before he took off up another flight of stairs towards his own chambers. If he was going to be Merlin, he might as well do what Merlin should do first thing in the morning.

-

Merlin grabbed one of Arthur's many shirts from the cupboard and made his way out of the Prince's chambers. This was all too weird; it had to be a dream.

There was no way he could live his life as the Prince, he had to get back to his chambers and look for some sort of counter spell – if it wasn't a dream anyway.

He turned the corner away from Arthur's room and felt a hand on his, tugging him into an alcove.

"Gwe-"

She kissed his quickly on the lips, silencing him before he could say anything more. He didn't know what made him do it, perhaps the fact that he was in his master's body that made him kiss back.

"Merlin! Guinevere!" he heard his own voice say – which was mighty weird – and Merlin pushed Gwen away from him, and turned to see himself standing in front of him.

"Did you get dressed in the dark?" Merlin asked him, Arthur looked down at Merlin's clothes, forgetting himself for a second before he turned his attention back to the fact that he was looking at himself with his arms around Gwen.

"Arthur?" Gwen was looking up at Merlin, Merlin in Arthur's body, and scowled. He shook his head, still slightly dazed and confused, "Merlin?" He nodded. Gwen turned and looked at Arthur - the real Arthur, who didn't look like Arthur – "I thought, I-"

"Trust me, I'm just as confused as you are," Merlin said, looking down at him, remembering himself and stepping out of the alcove and letting her go, "Sorry," he said to both of them, looking between them. He'd just apologised to himself.

"Merlin, what the hell is going on?"

"I have no idea. I just, woke up in your bed."

"Obviously some sort of Magic," Gwen said, looking from one to the other, still confused.

"What do we do?" Arthur asked.

"I need to get back to my room," both Merlin and Arthur took off towards the Physician's quarters, Gwen momentarily heading for Arthur's room – considering his face had commanded it – but quickly following after the two males.

-

Gaius was gone when they returned to Merlin's chambers, _Must be on his rounds,_ Merlin thought to himself, taking off into his room to find his book.

"Merlin, can you ever find anything in here?"

"Yes," seeing himself defending Merlin's mess was bizarre, "Everything is where I left it."

"As it would be if you tidied up."

"I never remember where I put things. If it's on the floor it's in one place."

Arthur shook his head and rolled his eyes at his manservant, his manservant who was clutching a really old looking book.

"Merlin, what _is_ that?"

"This is," he paused, fingering through the pages, "This is a book of magic-"

"Magic? You're a sorcerer?" Merlin's voice sounded shocked, not angry as such. Just the epiphany than that his namesake could do magic, after all the times Arthur had laughed at the thought, "You did this?"

"I didn't mean to!" Merlin defended himself again, finding the page with the original spell on it. He turned the page and the reversal spell presented itself, "Look, a cure. It'll all be fine."

Arthur and Gwen stood in a stunned silence looking at their friend, looking at the Prince.

Arthur watched himself reading a spell, something he never thought he'd see. He watched as his body held out his hand and read what sounded like Latin.

Merlin looked up at his body after he'd read the words on the page, breathing in a few heavy breaths before he slowly fainted sideways into his pillows.

"Merlin?" Gwen ran over to him, "Merlin!" she shook his arm and tried to wake him, "What do we do?"

Arthur strode over to his body, his princely strut now more of an awkward walk. He pulled himself up and held his body still. He was stuck in the shock of Merlin's magical abilities, but that gave him all the more reason to do what he was doing. He raised his hand and slapped his own face.

"Merlin?" Gwen asked again.

When he didn't wake she stood and made her way into the main chamber, returning seconds later with a goblet full of water. Arthur dropped himself back down on Merlin's bed. Gwen emptied the goblet on Merlin's face, to no avail.

"Did you have to do that?" Gwen looked at him and scowled.

"What else would you have me do?"

"That's me."

"That's Merlin. You're you-"

"You kissed Merlin-"

"He's you!"

"Exactly," she glared at him again.

"That was a trap."

"Sorry," she rocked herself sideways and butted herself into his arm, Merlin's smaller physique being taken by physics sideways and back again. He smiled down at her. Merlin's lopsided, ear to ear grin adorning his face. There was a time when Gwen would have preferred this. Merlin to Arthur, but now, the thought of it was weird, so when Arthur raised his arm to place it around her she moved away.

"Guinevere?"

"It's just," she stopped and looked at him sheepishly, "It's a little strange."

"We need to find a way to reverse this."

-

Half an hour later and Merlin was still out cold. Gwen had checked his breathing to make sure he was still alive. He was. Thankfully.

"I've looked through about twelve of these books and none of them have anything to do with this."

"Looked through of flicked through?" She asked approaching the desk, Arthur – in Merlin's body – looked sheepishly at the book in front of him, "You're not going to find it if you don't look properly."

"Who does that anyway?"

"Merlin does."

"I'm not Merlin."

"You look like Merlin."

"Doesn't mean I have to act like Merlin."

"Well if you're stuck like this for too long, you might have to start," She reasoned, only to hear movement in Merlin's room, a loud thump followed by a pained groan. Gwen walked into the bedroom, to see Arthur's body crumpled on the floor.

"Where am I?" the Prince's voice asked, looking confused around the room.

"You're in your room."

"This isn't my room. This is Merlin's room."

"That's you."

"No, Guinevere, I think I should know who I am. _You_ should know who I am."

"Merlin, Arthur is sat out there. He looks like you, but is him. You look like Arthur, but you're Merlin," she was even getting a bit confused now herself. Every time she saw Arthur in Merlin's body she lost Arthur a little bit more.

"Guinevere, I'm the Crowned Prince of Camelot."

"Like hell you are!" Arthur, the real Arthur in Merlin's body entered.

"Merlin! Finally," non-Arthur clapped his hands together and looked at the man parading as the manservant, "Maybe you can explain."

"I'm Arthur."

"I'm pretty sure you're Merlin."

"I look like you, but I am me."

"You look nothing like me."

"That's because you're me!"

"I'm you?"

"Yes."

"How much have you had to drink?"

"Arthur," both of the men looked at Gwen, "Instead of arguing about who's who, maybe we could find a cure. Reversal. Something to help?"

"He's the sorcerer that did this."

"I'm not a sorcerer, Merlin."

"You're Merlin, you're the sorcerer."

"You're a sorcerer?"

"Fine! Yes. I'm the sorcerer."

"You?"

"Me."

"But you're an idiot!"

"Am I really like that?" Gwen looked at the real Arthur, shaking her hand from side-to-side in disbelief, "Guinevere!"

"You'd only tell me off for lying. Let's just find a solution and we can have to back in the right bodies, okay?"

"Fine by me," non-Arthur replied, sitting back on the bed.

"Where do we start?" the Prince in the servant's body asked, eyeing himself with disgusted as he didn't opt to help.

"From the beginning."

-

"It would go a lot faster if you _helped_," Arthur complained as he looked through the third book he'd picked off the pile to scour through.

"I'm not being associated with magic."

"For the last time, you are the magician!" Arthur slammed his hand down on the table he was reading at, himself looking back at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Gwen, what have you given him?"

"Nothing, my lord."

"Stop calling him that, you're only making it worse," Arthur rubbed his, Merlin's, eyes. He groaned as he slammed the book shut, "Please tell me I was never that annoying."

"Pre-Merlin," he felt his jaw drop at this declaration. He was being so unreasonable. Arthur was helping, trying his hardest to help them, "I've got it!"

Gwen jumped up from her seat, grabbed her cloak and ran from the physician's quarters, nearly colliding with Gaius on the way out, "Guinevere?"

"Sorry Gaius, no time to explain!" the Court Physician looked after her as she ran down the steps, shaking his head he entered to Merlin looking into a pile of books.

"Merlin? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with Arthur?"

Arthur panicked, not knowing whether Gaius knew about the servant's powers and he knew he was harsh on Merlin when handing out his orders, Merlin being back here before lunch was highly unlikely.

"Arthur, he let me go early, something about training," Arthur looked up to Merlin's quarters, hoping against hope that his body didn't come sauntering out of there.

"Guinevere left here very fast, I wonder where she's going."

"No idea, said something about having to go and ran," Gaius turned his back on him, starting to gather the vials for his second lot of rounds.

"Well, I shall be back in an hour. I assume Arthur will need you by then. I shall see you for dinner."

"Okay," Gaius left again, only to be nearly flattened by Gwen on her way back in. He eyed her suspiciously and carried on his way.

"Here," Gwen handed Arthur a sprig of wild flowers.

"I'm honoured, but shouldn't it usually be the other way around."

"We make a potion," she pointed at the page she had left the book she had been studying open at on the table, "And soak them in it, put it under your pillows as you sleep and – hopefully – you switch back."

"You mean I've got to stay like this until the morning," Gwen glared at him, a look on distain on her features that told him to grow up and deal with it. He was the Prince of Camelot for pities sake and he couldn't handle being in a weird body for a while, "Sorry. So what do we do?"

-

Gwen had shown Arthur the pages of the book, it all seemed simple enough, but if it didn't work, he didn't want to be stuck as Merlin forever. Not with Merlin now actually believing he was Arthur.

It struck Arthur then. Maybe they should stay like that.

He'd have to learn to work as a servant, and put up with the long hours and being ordered around by his own body, but if he was a servant there were no barriers. He would be free to marry Gwen tomorrow if he pleased. Nobody would question it, he'd always suspected Merlin for liking Gwen back in the day.

"What are you thinking about?"

"You. Me. Merlin. You marrying me, as Merlin," Gwen laughed like it was the funniest thing she had heard in a long while, "What?"

"You are the future King, you can't stay like this."

"Merlin thinks he's me."

"You as the prattish spoiled Prince you used to be. The Prince that wouldn't have been half the King you would be now."

"But we'd be free," He reached over the table and took her hand in Merlin's.

"You're not you, it's not right."

"You'd rather it be difficult?"

"I'd rather you were the King, not Merlin."

"You just want to be Queen," Gwen laughed with him, shaking her head and pouring a few different ingredients into a glass tube and shaking.

"I'd rather not have to redo all my work on making Merlin a good King."

"Your work?" He leant across the table to poke her in the shoulder; she batted his hand away and read the next instruction from the book. She fumbled through the bottles of ingredients, finding what she was looking for and pouring a small amount into the glass tube, shaking it again, "What if this doesn't work?"

"It will."

"What if it doesn't?"

"Then you might get what you want," Gwen said nonchalantly as she placed the glass tube into a rack and grabbed a piece of string from Gaius' messy table. She beckoned for the flowers she had given Arthur, and he willingly passed them over.

She tied the stems together into two small bouquets. Next she poured equal amounts of her concoction into two wider based glasses, and placed a bundle of flowers in each.

"Now we wait."

"How long?"

"It says two hours, so we wait two hours, and then you can both sleep."

"It's lunchtime."

"You've never had an afternoon nap?" Gwen asked, voice full of doubt, a smile tugging on the corners of her mouth.

"How long does it take to work?" Arthur asked, changing the subject away from his supposed laziness.

"Just says 'leave under pillow'."

"Helpful," he groaned, "But better than nothing," he added before Gwen could reprimand him about it.

"I should go to the kitchens, they'll be wondering where I am," she stood and smiled at him, heading towards the door.

Though his reactions weren't as quick in Merlin's body, Arthur still managed to grab a gentle hold of her arm and tugged her towards him.

"I'll come by and see you later, but I suggest you sleep."

"Not even a kiss goodbye."

"Arthur, you're Merlin, it's just a bit- well it's a bit strange…"

Arthur stood; his current gangly exterior a little taller than Gwen that he was usually. He stooped and pressed a light kiss to her cheek. He felt her smile and pulled away from her, "I'll see you later. Hopefully as me."

"Have a nice afternoon, Arthur."

-

"Merlin!" Arthur groaned and stood making his way into Merlin's room.

"Yes?" he snapped, already fed up of being treated like a servant. He had made a mental note to be nicer to Merlin – after he made his life a living hell for a few days.

"Why am I still here?"

"You are ill, Sire. Gaius suggests you stay here," Arthur turned to walk out.

"Why can't I stay in my chambers?" Merlin whined.

"Risk of infection," Arthur said dead pan as he walked away, flopping onto the bench and looking at the flowers; they had changed colour.

Arthur picked up the book Gwen had been reading from, and scanned the instructions; 'On changing of colour the bundles are now ready for use.'

"Finally," reaching across the table he picked the two bundles out of the glasses and headed back into Merlin's room. Still a mess, but Merlin was fast asleep.

Arthur crept over to the wooden slates that Merlin had as a bed and slipped one of the bundles underneath the pillow.

Looking about the room on his way out, he set about picking up the random discarded items and putting them into one pile in the corner of the room, at least he wouldn't trip over now.

Arthur yawned, his head feeling a bit light. He stretched and made his way back down into the main room. He sat on the bench at the table and yawned again. Slowly he fell asleep, his arms crossed on the table and his head nestled in the crook of his elbow.

-

"Merlin!" he blinked a few times, the sensation of being shaken awake being a shock to his system. Confused he screw his eyes shut away before looking around. He hadn't fallen asleep here.

"Does Arthur know you're asleep?"

"Probably not," he rubbed his eyes and stretched himself out. Why hadn't Arthur come barging in to make him do work?

"What is all this doing out? Have you been experimenting again?"

"No. I haven't touched it."

As if on cue Gwen knocked just as she entered, smiling at the two men before her.

"Hi, Gwen."

"Hi, Merlin?"

"Who else?"

"You don't remember?"

"Remember what?"

"Never mind," she smiled to herself a laughed. A laugh which only became louder when she heard Arthur shouting for Merlin at the top of his voice, "I'll go," she disappeared through into Merlin's room, leaving behind a very confused servant and physician.

"What the hell am I doing here?"

"You don't remember?"

"Obviously not," he was still bewildered and bemused. He looked around Merlin's room, noting the tidied floor.

"Not a thing?"

"Last thing I know I was saying good night to you, and I wake up here."

It was probably for the best. If Arthur had had to hide Merlin's magic from his father, when it all came out he would have had to explain it all to him and landed him in bigger trouble. It was better he didn't know. Not that he wouldn't keep the secret, because he would, but because he was already hiding more than enough from the King, he didn't need to hide more from him.

And Merlin was safer the less people that knew.

And if Merlin didn't remember that she knew, Gwen wouldn't bring it up until he was ready to tell her.


End file.
